You Won't Believe How SKY Responded After I Held Them To Account For Mis-selling (But You Will Laugh)

You Won’t Believe How SKY Responded After I Held Them To Account For Mis-selling (But You Will Laugh)

(WARNING: This is a long rant about SKY TV, only read it if you like the whole “We’re all a bit tired of big companies taking the piss out of their customers” vibe. And some of it is very funny…)

This is a long running one. Sky have been uniformly rubbish in the customer service department for almost a year now, bandying my requests around from country to country, department to department. All I wanted was for them to admit that they mis-sold a TV package to me and refund me the money they took for it…

Let me start at the beginning (and I’m going to try and keep this snappy because it’s a long one – skim through if you want):

I used to have Sky TV, all of it, for about 8 years. Then I decided that £70 a month was too much and regular old Freesat combined with Netflix for £6 was ample for us (I can cope with Match of the Day) – So I cancelled it.

Bless Sky, clearly feeling the pinch with all the streaming media options making their satellite offering less and less appealing on a cost/value basis, they would always be calling me with some juicy offer or other.

On this particular occasion a young man called to tell me I could have the lot for £14 a month (for 6 months or some such deal). I said that’s fab, but when you add the extra £10 for HD it’s suddenly £25 and a bit too much for me right now, happy with my free/Netflix combo. He tells me that for an extra £1.50 (ish) a month I’d get full HD, movies and sport too! Amazing I thought, OK, deal! And he then informs me there’s a 7 day cooling off period so I can always change my mind. Win/win.

Cut to a few days later and movies and sports are still not in HD. I call them, only to be told I’d have to pay extra for that. But I was told it would all be in HD, I replied. No, they said, nobody would have said that. OK, I’ll cancel it then, it’s not been 7 days yet and I’m not happy. Sorry they said, there’s no ‘cooling off period’, and they promptly charged me for 2 months of this TV package that some little tyke had bullshitted me into over the phone.

Naturally aggrieved I explained I wasn’t happy and wanted a refund. They said they’d need to listen to the phone calls and that if it turned out I’d been mis-sold to, I’d get my refund. This would take up to 48 days they said. Fair enough I thought, leave them to sort that out. Mmmm.

4 months later and I’ve heard nothing. They’ve taken £35 out of my account of course, they managed to administer that, but I’d not heard back about the phone call listening or my refund. What follows is the email discourse that took place between myself and those cheeky monkeys at Sky during most of July and August.

(It’s not the money, it’s the attitude. Say anything to get the sale, take the money, and then hide behind it’s vast corporate arse when you try to get back what they owe you – I dread to think how much money they roll in every month from customers who simply give up trying to get what they’re owed).

goodthing

So I enquire after a patient 4 months…

Hi, I’m writing to see how the investigation is progressing on my mis-sold package? Details of the case should be on my account but several months ago you were going to check a recorded phone call and get back to me. Heard nothing since, Please advise. Thank you.

And they reply…

Dear Mr Wittering

 Customer Account Number: etc

I am sorry to hear that your previous experience with us was unsatisfactory and you wish to recieve an update with regard to the complaint you have raised. I apologise for the inconvenience this has caused.

I appreciate that you took the time to highlight this to us. We value you as a customer and assure you that your feedback has been taken into consideration. We will also implement this feedback to improve the service we provide.

I have checked your account and see that your Sky services are cancelled. After reviewing the notes on your account, I see that you have been promised HD pack along with your package but it was not included. I would like to inform you that Family pack has only basic HD channels and if you wish to view premium channels, Sports and Movies in HD you need to have HD pack activated on your account and it is £5.25 extra a month with Family package.

All our advisors are trained and briefed to provide accurate informations about the product and services to our customers before confirming the sale of any product. I’m sorry if there has been any confusion surrounding these conditions.

I understand that you wish to listen to the telephone calls. I would like to clarify that we record some calls for training and quality purposes only, therefore recorded telephone conversations cannot be requested to verify conversations.

In order to get the details of your Sky account and call transcripts, you’ll need to complete a Subject Access Request.

If you confirm you wish to do this, we will send the form to you within 5 to 7 working days.

This must be fully completed and returned to us at the address provided. Please include a £10/ €6.35 cheque, or postal order.

Upon receipt of the form and payment, you’ll receive your Sky account details and call transcripts within 40 days.

I hope this information has helped with your enquiry. If you require any further assistance, you can reply to my email.

To help us improve our service, please take a few seconds to answer the question on the following link: http://bit.ly/sky-email

Kind regards
Rajesh
Sky Help Centre
http://www.sky.com

No Rajesh, it clearly doesn’t help at all… so I write back:

Hi Rajesh,

Thanks for your reply but I’m afraid it doesn’t help with my enquiry.

Several months ago I was miss sold your product. I was informed by your telesales staff that the offer he was selling would include movies and sport in HD. I was also told that there would be a 7 day ‘cooling off’ period on the package he was selling to me. So I agreed to the package.

HD on movies and sport was not included. A 7 day cooling off period did not exist.

I was charged for something I was mis-sold.

I spent hours subsequently on the phone to your various call centres and departments repeating this same explanation that I’m having to repeat now. I was told that the calls would be listened to by your team and somebody would get back to me after that. I would also be refunded for the cost of the mis-sold package.

I have heard nothing, hence my request for an update.

I am NOT requesting ‘transcripts’ and neither would I pay you for the privilege of reading your miss selling tactics to myself!

I am very unhappy at how I was lied to by sales staff, had to spend hours talking to various people who have said they would investigate, report back and refund, NONE of which has happened. And I am still having to explain the same issue months later!!

Am I going to get an internal resolution to this mis-selling issue? Has anybody listened to the sales calls I was told would be investigated months ago? Have I been refunded or is there a refund in progress?

Regards
James Wittering

Now Pavithra gets involved…

Dear Mr Wittering

Customer Account Number: blah

I’m sorry that you had to contact us repeatedly to get your Sky packages mis-sold issue resolved.

I’ve reviewed your account and see that you’ve upgraded to Sky Family with Sky Sports and Movies pack from 28/03/2014.

I am sorry to hear that you are not happy with the HD trial offer removed as you were not informed about the HD  package promotional offer.

I would like to inform you that at the moment customers who subscribe to Entertainment Extra+ with premiums (Sports and / or Movies) and do not have the £5.25 HD Pack, are receiving their premium channels free of charge in HD as part of a trial.

I would like to inform you that the trial offer was created when Entertainment Extra+ was launched in April to ensure that the customers’ channels were displayed at the top of the EPG (for example Sky Sports 1 was channel 401). If we had not given customers who didn’t take the £5.25 HD Pack this trial their SD Sports / Movies would have been placed further down the EPG, meaning it would be more difficult for them to find their channels.

I would like to inform you that all our customers were notified on the 23 January that their trial is coming to an end.

You will still be able to access any HD Sports or Movies recordings they have after the trial has ended, as long as it was recorded prior to 6 February. Any recordings from 6 February onwards will require the £5.25 HD Pack and these changes will also be reflected across the Sky+ app.

I have checked your account details and see that the HD pack is not added on the account. Hence, you will not be able to watch the HD channels.

I, personally apologise, if all these details were not informed to you at the first place.

I also see that you’ve cancelled your services with us due to the inconvenience caused by us.

I request you to contact our Customer Services Team on phone who will help you to reinstate your services with us providing the best available offers for you.

Whilst I realise that you may be disappointed with the decision made, I hope that you can appreciate our position on this matter.

To help us improve our service, please take a few seconds to answer the question on the following link: http://bit.ly/sky-email

Kind regards
Pavithra
Sky Complaints Team
http://www.sky.com

OK, that makes very little sense, let’s try again…

Hi Pavithra,

Thanks for your response.

The only thing i can appreciate is that you haven’t answered my questions. Can you at least email this email trail to a team that can help me and answer my questions please?

Regards
James Wittering

Rajesh wants his say again, only his say is that they have no record of my issue!

Dear Mr Wittering

Customer Account Number: etc

I understand that you wish to avail a refund as you claim that you have been miss sold. I apologise for the inconvenience this has caused to you and hope below my reply clarifies the position for you.

After reviewing your account, I am unable to find any supporting notes that you have been offered the HD pack and the channels you have recieved as we had given them for one month trial. I am sorry to hear that you have been incorrectly informed. Please accept my apologies.

Also I am sorry to inform you that we are unable to process any refund as we have notified all our customers about this trail offer and also do not have any supporting notes for your claim.

Whilst I realise that you may be disappointed with the decision made, I hope that you can appreciate our position on this matter.

I hope this information has helped with your enquiry.

To help us improve our service, please take a few seconds to answer the question on the following link: http://bit.ly/sky-email

Kind regards
Rajesh
Sky Help Centre
http://www.sky.com

So I’m getting narky now, let’s just lay the facts out for them and make it really, really clear. Surely that’ll work?

Hi Rajesh,

Thanks for getting back to me.

This is getting a tad frustrating now. Not sure how many different ways I need to explain myself. I am not talking about any kind of month trial or whatevees and sport for (about) £14 per month on a rollingr it is you’re referring to. I am referring to the month to month offer I was miss sold over the telephone back in March that said I’d get the whole package including movi month to month basis, non contract. I’d also get HD for an extra £1.50. And that there was a 7 day ‘cooling off’ period.

Let’s just clarify again what I’m saying. If you cannot find supporting notes or understand what I’m saying then please refer my query to whatever team dealt with it months ago:

1. I was sold something that didn’t exist.

2. You charged me for it

3. I complained

4. You said you’d listen to the phone-call, investigate what was said and refund the charge.

5. You said it would take up to 40 days for you to listen to the calls and get back to me.

6. None of the above has happened yet

7. I’ve asked for an update

8. You’ve sent lots of emails talking about some other irrelevant offer and claiming to have no notes on my case and refusing to help, telling me you hope I understand your position.

The only position I understand is that Sky have mis-sold me their product and are now refusing to take responsibility for it.

Again: Am I going to get an internal resolution to this mis-selling issue? Has anybody listened to the sales calls I was told would be investigated months ago? Have I been refunded or is there a refund in progress?

If you can’t help – forward to a team who can please. A UK based team who dealt with it might be a start. Do your various teams communicate with each other?

Regards
James Wittering

Now Roopa wants in on the chat. Only it seems Roopa hasn’t actually read anything. Maybe ever, about anything…

Dear Mr Wittering

Customer Account Number: a number

I understand your concern with regard to HD channels being mis sold. Please accept my sincere apologies for all the inconveniences as I see you have been contacting us repeatedly about the issue.

I have checked your account and I’m sorry to know that you have cancelled Sky TV on 01/05/14. I am sorry that you are not happy with the package provided as you feel that the package provided is not the one which was confirmed at the time of sale.

As informed previously as the HD offer has been ended due to which in order to view Sports or Movies in HD, HD package is required. I’m sorry if this was not explained to you correctly.

As I’m unable to find any notes due to which we are not authorised to apply for refund. I can understand how you feel and appreciate your understanding in this matter.

I see there is a credit balance of £4.49(Sky Store).

Click here to view your bills in our My Sky area on Sky.com, you can view your bill, use Sky Go, upgrade your Sky subscription, change your payment details, make a payment, set up additional users and more.

You can also use the Sky Active services on your Sky box, by pressing ‘Interactive’ and selecting Sky Active, provided an active telephone line is connected to the Sky box.

On Sky Active you can view your bill, upgrade your Sky subscription, change your payment details, make a payment, view our ‘Help & Support’ articles and more.

A letter will be sent to you 45 days after the cancellation date of your Sky account confirming the amount that will be refunded. You’ll receive the refund within 3-5 days after the receipt of the letter.

This ensures that all appropriate credits and charges have been applied to your account.

I thank you for your past custom. In future if you wish to rejoin Sky you can visit the following link:

https://comeback.sky.com/YourDetails.aspx

I hope this information has helped with your enquiry. If you require any further assistance, you can respond to my email.

To help us improve our service, please take a few seconds to answer the question on the following link: http://bit.ly/sky-email

Kind regards
Roopa
Sky Help Centre
http://www.sky.com

Oh dear. One more try?

As previously requested, can you forward this to the UK based support team that originally were dealing with this issue, yes or no?

James Wittering

It worked!

Dear Mr Wittering

Thank you for your emails regarding your conversation on the 28th March 2014 with an agent in the Sky Help Centre and the agreed viewing package. I would like to take this opportunity to apologise for any confusion, frustration or inconvenience you may have experienced as a result of this and any subsequent contact with the Sky Help Centre since.

I tried to contact you this evening to discuss this matter, however, I could only leave a voice message.

I have requested that the call in question be located and investigated so that we can confirm what was advised with regards to your viewing package. This can normally take up to 14 days to be returned but I will contact you to discuss this and any necessary action as soon as the feedback from this is received.

I would like to apologise for the time it has taken to reach this point and thank you for your continued patience with regards to this. I would also like to offer the assurance that I have now taken full ownership of this matter and will keep you updated with any progress I may make. If I can offer any further advice before you hear from me with the outcome of this matter then please reply to this email and it will be directed to me.

Kind regards,
Louise
Service Excellence Consultant

Aaaah, at last, a SERVICE EXCELLENCE CONSULTANT! For me! Now we’re getting somewhere. I’m confident Louise is going to help me…

In the meantime we have a chat on the phone and they apologise and tell me they’re going to listen to the calls and sort things out. I’m a valued customer after all!

So I sit back and wait (not completely, I mean I get on with my life. It may not look like I have the time for a life with all this going on but I sometimes do other stuff. Don’t judge me).

Then a reply….

Dear Mr Wittering,

Thank you for your patience while we have been investigating the discussion you had with an agent within the Sky Help Centre on the 28th March 2014 regarding your Sky Viewing Package. I would like to offer my sincere apologies for the time this investigation has taken.

I can confirm that you were advised that an offer of 75% off your viewing package would be applied. This would result in a cost of 14.25GBP per month without the HD package or 15.50GBP with the HD package; this would include Sports and Movies in HD. You were also advised that this would not begin a new 12 month contract. In view of this I have applied a credit of 1.28GBP that will be refunded to you along with the current account credit of 4.49GBP.

I hope this helps to resolve this matter and if we can offer any future assistance, please do not hesitate to get in touch.

Kind regards,
Louise
Service Excellence Consultant

OK, so you’re saying I was miss sold to but you’re only going to refund me £1.28? Oh Louise, this isn’t service excellence is it? So I reply…

Thanks for looking at this Louise:

I’m not sure what the £1.28 refund is for. I was charged £35(ish).

When I called to let you guys know I hadn’t received what I’d ordered, I was told I would have to pay 2 months up front (for the mis-sold package) and this would be refunded once the calls had been listened to and confirmed. The calls have been listened to and confirmed so I’d expect a full refund.

Thanks in advance of your continued assistance.

James

That’ll do it. She’ll engage excellent service mode and sort this out…

Dear Mr Wittering,

Thank you for your responding email regarding the arranged refund of 1.28GBP. I am sorry for any confusion this may have caused.

I can advise that the refund given is the difference between the amount you were advised the package without HD would cost; 14.25GBP, and the amount paid. This is the full refund that can be provided with regards to this matter.

Kind regards,
Louise
Service Excellence Consultant

Or not…

Thanks for the reply Louise.

However, could I just ask: If I called you up and told you I would send you a lovely pair of Wellies for £14.28, and that for a further £1.28 I’d send you a pair of Jimmy Choos, and you opted for the Jimmy Choos (safe in the knowledge that there was a 7 day ‘cooling off’ period) and I sent you the wellies and charged you £35 – would you feel cheated? And if you then, understandably, called and cancelled the wellies and asked for a refund only to be told that I’d need 40 days to listen to the phone call to check I’d actually sold you something you didn’t want, and this then took 5 months, during which time, you were sent countless emails from people who could barely write English, often denying that anything had occurred at all, would you be happy with that? And if, after all that time, you received an email saying you’d not get a refund for the thing you DIDN’T ORDER but rather just the £1.28 difference – would you feel that “This is the full refund that can be provided with regards to this matter”?

I’m not sure how else to put it, but here are the salient facts:

SKY mis-sell product to long standing customer

Long standing customer realises he’s been mis-sold to and asks for his money back

SKY agree to listen to the call and refund accordingly but instead ignore him for 5 months

Customer reminds SKY who deny all knowledge of the case

Customer wastes yet more time reminding them

SKY finally listen to the call, admit they mis sold the product but only offer £1.28 back

Is that SKY’s final decision on this mis-selling issue?

And finally, would SKY like to contribute any further comment that I will fairly append to the blog post about the entire risible experience that will be shared with a vast social network full of like minded folk who are tired of being shafted by large companies.

Warm regards
James

Right, now that will get my point across, surely…

Dear Mr Wittering,

Thank you for your responding email regarding the refund provided. I am sorry that you are unhappy with my previous response and the refund given but must advise that both are accurate and so this is the final position on this matter.

It was found that during the call on the 28th March 2014 you were advised both the cost of your viewing package with HD and without. When the order was processed, however, the agent had not included the HD package. The billing incurred as a result of this was-

Family with Sports and Movies

28/03/14 – 05/04/14

4.50GBP

Family with Sports and Movies

06/04/14 – 30/04/14

12.92GBP

Total- 17.42GBP

As these services were available from the 28/03/14 until the 30/04/14 the billing does stand, however, this has been amended due to the advice given regarding the offer applied and so a refund of 1.28GBP given.

Kind regards,
Louise
Service Excellence Consultant

Nope, still missing the point. Let’s tell her she’s missing the point…

I think you’re missing the point. In subsequent phone calls I was told that I would be refunded completely if it was discovered I had been mis-sold to. Not refunded £1 something, but the entire fee I had been charged for the PRODUCT I CLEARLY DID NOT ORDER.

If you sell me something based on mis-information (Including telling me there was a ‘7 day cooling off period’ that there wasn’t – check your phone-calls) and then you don’t give me what you said you would, then you are obliged to fully refund me. Not partially, but fully. This is basic consumer rights stuff we’re talking about here. You’ve admitted you mis-sold your product to me. So please arrange a refund. It is against the law for you to retain the money you took from my account for a product you have admitted I did not order. It doesn’t matter whether or not you delivered a service, you did not deliver what was promised, it was therefore not fit for purpose.

Please stop acting illegally and refund my money. And can you please not let it take the 4+ months this debacle has taken thus far.

Regards
James

But alas, it seems it’s their final word…

Dear Mr Wittering,

With regards to your viewing package, I can advice that it was agreed that you would subscribe to the Family package with Sports and Movies, and the HD package in addition to this. The correct viewing package was then activated and provided to you. Unfortunately, however, the additional HD package was not activated at this time.

I am sorry that you continue to be unhappy with the advice and refund I have provided. I must, however, advise that both are accurate and so nothing further can be offered with regards to this matter.

Regards,
Louise
Service Excellence Consultant

Right, time to make a formal complaint. They are obliged to escalate it then aren’t they?

But look what they  are sending me in the post while this is going on…

deserve

So I remind her…

Whilst this continues I continue to get mail from you telling me “I deserve more”. I agree. Honesty and integrity would be a start though.

but…

Dear Mr Wittering,

I can advise that I have handled and registered this matter as a formal complaint. Our complaints procedure begins when you highlight the matter to us, we then investigate this and provide a response with the appropriate resolution. If you are then unhappy with this response you are within your rights; as a customer, to seek advice from a third party.

Louise
Service Excellence Consultant

Oh…

I’m not giving up now…

So even though I only bought your product on the basis that you said it would be in HD (mis-sold), and you also advised there was a 7 day cooling off period (mis-sold), and it wasn’t in HD and therefore of no use to me, and I called to cancel, you are are categorically saying that I am not due a refund? Is that correct?

Let’s just get a yes or a no eh Louise?

Dear Mr Wittering,

I must again advise that the information and refund provided are both correct and nothing further can be added with regards to this matter.

Kind regards,
Louise
Service Excellence Consultant

Oh…

Can you not answer my question Louise?

No she cannot, but she can go on holiday (or maybe the poor girl has simply had enough and moved on to a case where she can better apply her service excellence training that I imagine they get).

Dear Mr Wittering

Louise is currently out of the office on a short holiday.

I am happy to call you to discus this matter if you are available today at some point?

I look forward to hearing from you.

Regards
Lesley
Executive Support Team

Lesley! Hello Lesley, You’re only the 10th person I’ve had to speak to about this. Good job Sky isn’t a 9 person team, we’d never have got anywhere!

Let’s give Lesley a call…

Eventually, after 20 minutes wading through answering machine options I reach a human called Shosip (pronounced Yoseep) a helpful chap in intent who searched his entire SKY directory looking for a Lesley Hume or even just an Executive Support Team that he could put me through to, to no avail…. I’ll have to email Lesley and let her know that phone number she gave me won’t get us talking after all….

Finally we spoke!

Lesley dealt very patiently with me but was adamant that their refund of £1.28 was as much as they would be prepared to refund (of the £32 they took from my account for the Mis-sold service).

She told me I could seek the advice of a third party. I told her that it was not really a cost effective solution for me for the sake of £32 but that it was a point of principle after 8 years of lining Sky’s coffers I was disappointed that they were happy to say anything to get my money, but not refund it once proved that it was a mis-selling tactic that had got my cash in the first place.

And that was that!

I asked who I should speak to next to clarify Sky’s position and policy on mis-sold products and she informed me that her colleague Louise (remember Louise?) was a high as you could go in customer service and her decision was final. If I wanted to escalate my claim I have been told I should go to sky.com and look at their T&Cs. Not massively helpful, so instead I Googled Sky’s board members…

I figured I should speak to the Sales Director, who should surely take responsibility for the actions of his employees. According to the website

http://corporate.sky.com/about_sky/our_board_and_management/executive_team

stephenvanrooyen@skycustomersupport.com

Stephen Van Rooyen is the man I want to get in touch with – Let’s see what Stephen has to say… (don’t feel obliged to read this, you know the points now, this is just for Stephen, so he’s up to date. See, Stephen is the Director above the guys who have been mis-selling. Yet so far, you know more than him about what’s been going on – good eh?

Hi Stephen,

I am writing with regard to a mis-selling issue I have unfortunately encountered with Sky. Last March one of your sales team offered me a package over the telephone.

This episode has taken 6 months of my time to try to resolve and the result of this process is that your Service Excellence Team has decided that money I have had removed from my account by Sky for a product they agreed (after investigation – listening to the original sales call) was mis-sold – will not be refunded to me.

Your sales agent sold me a package that included HD sports & movies and was subject to a 7 day cooling off period.

As it turns out out, there was no HD movies or Sports (the very items I agreed with the agent were my reason for agreeing to pay for the package) or 7 day cooling off period – so, in brief:

  • SKY mis-sell product to long standing customer

  • Long standing customer realises he’s been mis-sold to and asks for his money back

  • SKY agree to listen to the call and refund accordingly but instead ignore him for 5 months (seriously – heard nothing at all until I nudged them)

  • Customer reminds SKY who deny all knowledge of the case (I was shuffled from advisor to advisor, each denying they knew anything about it!)

  • Customer wastes yet more time reminding them

  • SKY finally listen to the call, admit they mis-sold the product, apologise, but only offer £1.28 back instead of the £32ish taken from his account.

It’s not the money Stephen; your colleague pointed out that I could involve a third party if I felt this decision was unfair. I explained that for £32 it was not a very cost effective direction for me. I am simply very disappointed that I can pay you for a service for so long, only to be mis-sold to and subsequently ignored for months, only to be told that even though they agreed I had been mis-sold to, that the money taken for the service I didn’t order would not be refunded.

I only have the one question. Is it Sky’s policy, on uncovering a clear case of mis-selling, to refuse to refund any money that was clearly paid to Sky based on the misleading and incorrect information that was believed by the customer?

Thanks in advance of your time and advice.

Warm regards
James Wittering

Right – so we’re going right to the top (I’m going to copy this email to his Linkedin profile too – just so we know he’s got it…)

A response! Only, hang on, this isn’t from Stephen. It’s from Mahesh, surely Stephen’s right hand man…

Dear Mr Wittering

I am sorry to hear that the Sky package was miss sold and you were provided with lack of assistance and consideration when you contacted us. I apologise for the inconvenience caused.

In order to progress your enquiry, please reply to this email with the following details:

1) The full address of the Sky account, including postcode OR Sky account number

2) The first and last characters of your Sky account password.

I look forward to receiving this information at your earliest convenience. In the meantime, if you need any further help, you can reply to my email.

To help us improve our service, please take a few seconds to answer the question on the following link: http://bit.ly/sky-email

Kind regards
Mahesh
Sky Help Centre

I suppose we’ve come this far, may as well play ball, just in case he’s actually sat next to Stephen…

Thank you for your response Mahesh.

For the past 6 months I have been dealing with lots of representatives from Sky’s help desk and various Service Excellence Consultants in the Sky Executive Support Team, I’ve explained the issue dozens of times to about a dozen people, wasting hours and hours of my time with, as yet, no satisfactory resolution. This email was addressed to Stephen Rooyen – director of sales and marketing – in the hope he could provide an answer to my question.

Can you direct this email to him or advise me of a different email address I can reach him with?

Warm regards
James

And then nothing for a while. No doubt, Mahesh is standing with Stephen at the water tower at Sky Headquarters, just down the corridor from the Service Excellence squad, pondering on how to best satisfy this disgruntled customer.

Finally, a response.

Dear Mrs Wittering

We’ve received a request to cancel your Sky account. To complete this action we need to speak to you to confirm your security information. We’ll attempt to call you over the next few days so we can verify the required details with you, however if we’re unable to speak to you it may mean that we will be unable to complete your request.

If you’d like to get in touch before then please give us a call on 03332 022 152 and we’ll be happy to help. We’re open from 8.30am until 8pm, 7 days a week. Calls are free from a Sky Landline. Calls to 03 numbers are the same as 01 and 02 numbers. If these are not included in your call package, BT customers pay 9p per minute and 15p connection. Calls from other providers will vary.

If you don’t want us to progress with your request then no further action is required from you.

We look forward to speaking with you.

Please do not reply to this email as your reply will be sent to an unmonitored mailbox where emails cannot be read or responded to. If you have any questions or comments before we contact you, please call us on the number provided.

To help us improve our service, please take a few seconds to answer the question on the following link: http://bit.ly/sky-email

Kind regards
Lynn
Sky Help Centre
http://www.sky.com

Dear lord Lynn. There really is no hope here is there? Words fail me really, as does the will to continue trying to get a reasonable response from anybody, in any Sky team, anywhere in the world.

You’re probably as bored as me by now so let’s bottom line it:

Sky have been dishonest, then ignorant, then remarkably inefficient, then admitted mis-selling, then ignorant again. And finally, a bit more ignorance for good measure. They were very effective at taking my money out of my account though. That didn’t take 6 months and 15 members of their staff! And now I’m my own wife. Amazing.

The end. Now go and get a cup of tea, you’ve earned it…

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